Ham and Beans

My husband, Tex, does the grocery shopping. I know this is backwards, but we can only afford Walmart right now and I can never work up the energy to face Walmart. I worked there for a few months when I was really desperate for a job. Going back now just irritates me. Plus I am really lazy and my husband has a complex that doesn't allow him to sit still. Grocery shopping is perfect for him, however I think he's getting bored.

I eat soup and crackers everyday for lunch. Tex forgets that I don't like a variety of food. He wants to try everything and I want simple chicken and noodle or vegetable beef. With Tex buying the soup I get interesting flavors such as chicken fajita and today's ham and beans. I will admit, the ham and beans was really good. Then. Now the beans have worked their way through my digestive system and are wreaking havoc on anyone in the living room. Because Tex bought the soup I don't feel so bad.

As a girl, I don't want to smell like a fart. I want to smell like a girl. Pretty flowers, soft fruity scents, and even the occasional food flavoring should waft from my skin. But no, the older I get the more I smell like my dad. My dad does not smell good. His digestive system torments people on a daily basis. I don't want to torment people. I just want to enjoy food like a normal girl, without the after effects.