I’m sitting in a million year old recliner, but I want to be in California. I’m watching reruns of Big Bang (which is set in California), after watching the new episode, and a commercial for California pops up. So I want to be in California beside that dude from Food Network with the bleach blonde hair eating some massive man meal he just cooked with our guest of honor Sheldon Cooper.
People swear parts of California aren’t what they are cracked up to be. According to Tucker Max and Joe, LA is the worst place in the world. As Tucker Max pointed out, there is a reason the reality shows featuring people who are famous for being famous such as Laguna Beach and that other show with all the blondes is set in LA. Joe just thinks LA is dirty. Which doesn’t make sense seeing as all the blondes erupting from there look very clean. “Look” is probably the operative word here.
My sister-in-law swears San Diego is the best place in the world. She lives in Vegas and has traveled all over, so I trust her. Apparently the weather is perfect year round and wine just falls out of the sky straight into your mouth. I’m not a big wine fan, but for perfect weather I could learn to love wine. If I could ensure there would be magic little elves to make my coffee in the morning with fresh ground beans I’d be packed in a second.
The commercials always show a variety of landscapes. I think I would like the variety. Imagine: snow, beaches, deserts, cities, and forests all in one state. Forgetting the fact that it takes several hours to drive from one landscape to the next, I would never be bored. I could skip school on Friday for a hike through the redwoods, spend Saturday snowboarding (I don’t know how to snowboard, but like the wine thing, I’m willing to learn), and then Sunday lounging by a vineyard.
Another thing those commercials always show…famous people! I haven’t met anyone famous yet and I desperately need to meet someone famous. I have a few in mind and I don’t even know if they live in California, but I feel like being in the state would be enough to up the chances of me meeting someone famous. I’m sure I would make a fool of myself and stammer while staring uncontrollably, but it would be worth it to share a moment with Josh Hartnett. Or Alexander Skarsgard. Maybe even Ryan Reynolds.
When I’m finally done with Georgia, California will welcome me with open arms. Austin is willing. That snowboard idea is right up his alley.
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